Okay, you got me- I can’t MAKE someone more Latino, but I’ll give you my credentials:
Born a Caribbean mutt, both Puerto Rican & Cuban, I’ve got a killer Boriqua accent and a lot of confusion over the right words to use given any context. ¿Basura ó zafacón, habichuelas ó frijoles? IYKYK.
I live in Miami and depending on who you talk to, the same word in Spanish can either mean bugs or dicks. I had my work cut out for me.
Long story short, I married a French guy. Not a Canadian-French, not from Baton Rouge- no no- 100% La Revolucion, baguette French– Low sugar and all. Assimilating him into my family was easy because he’s fabulous- but here are a few things he picked up along the way:
1. Language: We all love to curse, it’s one of the first things we ask our bilingual friends. The good news is the Spanish puta is basically the French putain. Mierda is merde! I had it easy in the language department. Plus apparently “mira!” is more fun to explain than “look!”
Any opportunity to avoid -th sounds is ALWAYS taken (I’m looking at you, English). Esto ó eso is what you’ll hear at home, no this or that nonsense.
2. Food: My husband is the one who cooks, so recipe sharing was an absolute must early on. Following any old recipe is easy enough, but the secret for me was to introduce th concept of sofrito. What’s a sofrito? It’s everything! A tasty pâté BACKBONE of the traditional Caribbean flavors I love. Now, it’s the backbone of most of our home-cooked meals- yum!
3. Manners: Alright, I’m guilty of an Irish exit at any given family party so this one REALLY is the hardest struggle for the both of us. If you’ve never been to a Latino family gathering, know one thing and one thing only: even if your aunt and cousins that you see every other weekend are over for BREAKFAST, you MUST greet every single human individually.
'Doesn’t matter if you’re in PJs and have morning breath– NO EXCUSES; because no one wants to put up with un malcriado. Mwah mwah– cheek kisses for all. Then you have to do it all again when they leave! The French have the double-cheek kiss, but we’ve got never-ending goodbyes. Touché!
It’s just a matter of time before close friends become “aceres,” but the good news is most of this happened with time and frankly, little effort.
Thanks for taking a glance into my Cuban/PuertoRican/French fusion home. Like any proper fusion establishment, I also don’t know if our Flan is more French or Cuban.